Showing compassion and understanding to our children

Many public schools continue to cane children in Africa. This mirrors what is taken place in our homes.

One of the things I know for sure is that spanking children as punishment is not just and not the ideal form of discipline.

When I think about why my mother would occasionally spank us, I realized 2 things. The first is that throwing her hand or finally asking for a belt exemplified her exasperation with the problem at hand. Her frustration level had risen so high that words had failed common sense. In addition, there was either not enough time or patience to correct the issue.

In one occasion I remember my mother throwing her hand because I had failed to not clean a dish well. But to my defense I was never taught how to wash dishes. I was just basically told that a child my age should just know how. There were no tutorials. Or I remember the many times I was chastised for not brushing my teeth well. But no one ever taught how to properly brush your teeth. And ironing, you guessed it, no lessons.

Children need our patience; we do not come with manuals. We were all children. Treat children the same way you wished adults treated you as a child. We must understand children learn what we teach them. Yes some children are more stubborn than others but that just means we have to be more creative and patient in teaching them.

I know there are times that you can teach a child ten times not to slam the door, but like my children they continue to slam it as they forget what you said minutes ago.  But the good news is the children’s forgetfulness and irritation in your eyes, mirrors how God sees us for the many different petty things we do. For as you see your children; God sees you.

Instead of finding ways to knock that child down, ask yourself would I want God react to me with similar fury? Would I want my mistakes to be seen through love and kindness? When you stop and ask those questions a smile will come to your face as you continue to remind your children to treat the door with more patience. I know I do because God’s mercy has allowed me to show mercy to all even small children slamming doors in our rented home.