In honor of Maurice Sixto, whose social comedic analysis and skits have taught me to pay attention to how the world unfolds.
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I people watch. I observe, analyze, critique and survey who does what, why, when and where. I notice how age, gender, geographical location and the notion of class influence how we do things. Dialogue and discourse was encouraged in Haiti, more so than other countries.
In Haiti, I observed how parents of Mulattoes (children of mixed race), construct and redefine how they raise their children. I noticed this group was distinct in its attempts to be perceived different and socially mobile and better-off. Their children were afforded the best that the society provided; and society applauded their attempts. But not all Mulattoes were/are equal. Respect is given to those perceived as descent and respectful. Children of an old white man and a young girl who used to be his maid are not given the same privilege of respect as those of children whose parents were social equals. So the effort Mulattoes put on providing top education for their children was in attempt to gain social respect and acceptance.
And while there was an emphasis on providing children quality education or the best that money can buy, I am surprised to find something else amongst mulattoes in Ghana. Instead of an emphasis on education, abstract knowledge, philosophy and art, I find emphasis on gathering and securing material things. I name this group in Ghana, Materials.
From Mulattoes in Haiti to Materials in Ghana, the big difference rests on respect and decency. Many of the Materials are children to parents who are gravely social unequals. The fathers tend to be much older, more educated and with the financial backing to permit him attract a much younger, less educated and unemployed girl. In fact, many of the men suffer from some form of psychological problems as they are in need of showcasing their lost of power (youth, status, white wife) over some of Ghana's most under privileged population.
Because the Material mom is often less educated than the new social circle her relationship with the old man has briskly provided her, she is often found shadowing a white woman and her children. From house help to madam, she is the new friend to the white women, whom she would have most likely be working for if it were not for this brief fling with the white man. So what she feeds her children; the Material mom follows. Their extra curricular activities become the Material moms' only because the term was unknown to them until quite recently. As the partly social misfit, they follow while trying not to be noticed as peculiar and disturbing.
You can tell a Ghanaian woman raising a Material child by how much emphasis she puts on money. She drops numbers as efficiently as a 4 year old. Twenty thousand hundred for this, five hundred billion trillion for that. And where are these fake monies allocated? To shoes, pizza, Ipads and toys. Any books? Not if you don't want to be perceived as poor. Women raising Materials do not buy books. They buy things that people can easily agree are expensive.
And education? They believe the child's skin color will open doors. The same way the old white men's skin color worked for him.
Are all Materials children of mixed race? No. Materials are a culture that others can buy into, just like being western. If the emphasis is providing your children parties that cost more than salaries that Members of Parliament filter out of the economy, and you live to brag about it, then you are raising a Material. If your child has an Ipad but is below reading level, or you don't know which reading level s/he should be on, then be proud to classify yourself as part of this group. I say group because they are not really a class, since their economic standing is inconsistent and not dependent on real money but the idea of money in relation to what they envisioned, (not too long ago), that $100 could solve all their problems.
Because the Materials mom is often less educated than the new social circle her relationship with the old man has briskly provided her, she is often found shadowing a white woman and her children. From house help to madam, she is the new friend to the woman, who she would have most likely be working for if it were not for this brief fling with the white man. So what she feeds her children; the Material mom follows. Their extra curricular activities become the Material mom's only because the term was unknown to them until quite recently. As the partly social misfit, they follow while trying not to be noticed as peculiar and disturbing.
Why do the Material moms, yes, only moms because the fathers are really not in the picture, stress getting things and buying more things for their children? Because as new salaries (not money really), they only know what they can get with money. What they can, not what can be learned or gained from money. They, like many of us, are trying to provide for their children what they were denied as children. And most of these women remember not getting beautiful dresses, nice shoes, coca cola and other foods that the real elite shun.
And what about the men?They don't tend to have relationships with their children, which many did not want to have in the first place. They realized their age and having younger children further emphasized their mortality. Many will not live to see their children, whom they did not want in the first place, graduate from junior high school. One woman in such a situation confided that the man did not want children, because his grandchildren are older than the child would be. It was only after she swore that he would have no further obligation to the child that he stopped demanding an abort or an end to the relationship. These men know how indispensable such women/older girls are. Other women confided that having children raised their social status in the eyes of the community. Not having children would meant they not worthy of respect and engaged in indecent behavior with the old white men.
What about white women married to African men? They are a different story. They are trying to raise a difference race; but not African/Black. They epitomize how racism works; silent, blatantly unnoticed, and schematic. How can you tell the two groups apart? Materials are raising children they wish you would accept as white. Their names tend to be, "Harry, Victoria, Elizabeth," echoing a time when the British had an Empire and people cared about your relationship within it. White women married to African men are raising children they wish you would accept as white Africans. They choose the local names for that specific reason...to be asked over and over again where that name came from and how the child relates to that culture.
What do the Material moms gain from such relationships? Only what their bags can carry. Stay tuned for more.
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